Moving… Again

Some of you might wonder why I have been so quiet lately. Yes my posts are usually infrequently, but lately they have been even worse. When should you expect a new post? Well that is easy – expect one when you get one…

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Why you might ask? Because I have been buuuuuuuusy. Not with vacations or reading or any of the other “luxuries” you miss out on when you are a Mom of 2 small kids who work for herself and whose husband is working full time while completing his MBA. Busy with packing and unpacking boxes. So not fun, at all. We found out that we have to move about 2 months ago. We were blissfully unaware that our landlord was not planning on renewing our lease, and so had no rush or reason to look for another house. Then came the shock – she gave us our 2 months’ notice. Wow. Big surprise, and not the good kind. Immediately a house-search was launched, and luckily we found the perfect place in between tiny flat number 4 and ghastly old-run-down house number 6. But the place was available 1 March and we could only move in 1 Apr. The Husband had to use his best negotiating techniques, as one landlord had to be convinced to let us leave a month earlier, and another to keep the property a month longer in case the current landlord wanted to be difficult. He is such a rock-star, because he managed to convince current landlord to let us go a month earlier, and thus we could sign the new lease. Now, to give you some background, we have been married just short of 5 years. In the 5 years we have moved 4 times, over and above my business which has moved twice in the same period of time. We joke that if our things see boxes they start getting in themselves, and we no longer have house-warmings, we merely call them Friday night braais. What made this move different to the previous ones, for once I would not have to pack, move, and unpack either while pregnant or with a new-born baby. At least we had that going for us. Also for the first time we had enough time before the move to actually pack. The previous times we kind of decided to move on a whim, and so all of our earthly belongings were piled into our cars and onto the bakkies of friends and family-members to be unloaded in the most un-organised fashion in the middle of our soon-to-be living room. I packed boxes, neatly and organised, each box being marked and sorted for easy reference later on. Things were thrown out – many of them long forgotten, or never liked, or even some that we still don’t know where they came from. Amazing how much junk we accumulate without even realising. Because the new house was vacant, we could move in 2 days earlier which gave us a bit more time to get everything out of the old house and into the new. But even when stretched over 2 days moving is horrible. Maybe the stretching made it worse, only prolonging the agony and anguish. I think what made it worse was having to do it with 2 kids – not because they get in the way or anything arbitrary like that, but rather because now you have 2 more people to prepare mentally. I would rather pack and move and unpack again than having to do that….

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For weeks before the move A1 was difficult, crying easily, sleeping badly, not eating. She does not handle change very well, and it takes her ages to stabilise after anything changes, and with something as big as a move the time-frame is even longer. I had to pack her whole room in one night because she was freaking out thinking that we were going to leave her behind – I stupidly told her (after she tried taking something out of a box) that if something wasn’t packed it would not go with. Imagine the fear when her clothes and toys and things were not packed first… The over-reactive imagination of a 3 year old. We are now in the new house for 2 weeks, and still she refers to it as the “other” house, asking when we are going back to “her” house. It is getting better but very slowly; I am expecting at least another month of this confusion and uncertainty. A2 is luckily still too small to really understand what is happening, and so the adjustment has been faster and easier for her. In the new house we have a garden with actual real-life grass – one of the benefits of being in the new house. We struggle to get them inside at night, and in the mornings the door must be opened first thing so that they can go outside. The girls each have their own room, another plus point, and a play room for all of their toys. Now if A1 can just realise how awesome the new place is!

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They say moving is one of the top 5 most traumatic events or things that can happen to you. I don’t fully agree except to the degree of exhaustion that goes with moving. I am tired of packing, of sorting, of deciding what to keep and what to chuck, of looking for a house, working out our finances so that we could actually afford to move, moving, unpacking. All the while trying to have a ‘normal’ family life, for the sake of the kids. Exhausted from putting up paintings, and decorating, because I am sure as hell staying put for at least 2 years, and the Husband must hear me – I am only moving if it will be to our own owned home! Until that day, I am staying put. For now, we are trying to get everything and everyone back to normal, and until then my days are kind of full. And that is why you should expect a post when you see a post!